Monday, November 26, 2012

NEW GAME: Bang That Bridesmaid

Probably one of the best games ever invented on earth. Just plain genius. "Bang That Bridesmaid" is simple, rules are easy and anyone can play. We look at each bridesmaid and the bride, and we decide which of the group we want to bang. None of that Marry, Fuck, Kill, shit here, too ironic, just straight "Bang That Bridesmaid." In this beautiful wedding ceremony, in central park, we have 1 bride, and 3 bridesmaids. Each Bridesmaid was allowed to choose her own outfit. He knows this because He saw the outfits, and there is no way anyone told them that was a good outfit to wear, so they obviously selected it themselves. It was a small, low budget wedding, in Central Park, on a beautiful fall day. The Bride is featured above, and before we start let's just say she is wearing the highest heel out of them all, and that should never happen. 

Let's Play "Bang That Bridesmaid"....
Bridesmaid #1: Hey babe, its fall, not spring, so stop dressing like a flower. Hair looks half decent, but that dress is just making you look hipper then you already are. Also weird that your dress kinda looks like Moms up ahead. At least you are wearing a decently high heel, more to come...He would not Bang you. Well not until after He had a few drinks at the cocktail hour.

Bridesmaid #2: Hello Blondie. Not really a fall wedding outfit you have on there, and something tells He you are a bit conservative and a tight ass. Maybe it was the undershirt you are wearing under the dress, or the smaller sized heels. Kinda feels like you want to be anywhere but at this wedding, odds are you are the one who gets overly drunk at this wedding. He will keep a close eye on you. Odds are we will be meeting in a closet by the end of the night.
Bridesmaid #3:  Oh god, almost puked in my mouth a little bit. Not sure what makes this most unattractive, the heels or the dress. There is no change He wants to bang you, and no amount of alcohol at this wedding to make your dreams come true of getting picked. And PS, heels at weddings not wedges!

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